by Mary Clifford Morrell
When my children were young, and I would catch them doing something they shouldn’t be doing, they would always ask, “How did you know?”
“Moms know everything,” I would reply.
When one of my sons went to college and was injured playing lacrosse, he had to go the hospital but never told me about his injury. He didn’t want to worry me. The next day I called him to ask him what happened and to find out how badly he was hurt.
There was a long pause on the end of the line before he said, ”How do you always know? It just happened yesterday.” I reminded him, “Moms know everything,” and if they don’t know, they inevitably find out.
It’s not something you can really explain, but I took advantage of the mystique while I could. He didn’t know for years that the hospital had called me for a bit of information because he put his home phone number on a form.
The truth of the matter is parents don’t know everything, and when our children are dealing with anxiety or fear or trauma, one of the most important things we can do as parents is admit that we don’t have all the answers.
During these past few months, and most likely for some time into the future, our children are going to have many questions about what is happening, why things are so different, are they in danger of getting sick or dying, and if things will ever go back to normal.
We can help them by giving them permission to ask the difficult questions and, when we don’t know an answer, offer to talk it over, throw out ideas, and be learners together.
The key to be able to do this is to first listen to our children. By listening we begin to develop the gift of wisdom given to us by the Holy Spirit. Wisdom will help us discern what is best for our children to hear from us and from the TV, based on their emotional states, their behaviors, and their unique needs.
Paramount to caring for children during times of anxiety is caring for ourselves. Our children know when we are stressed or fearful, even if we believe we are hiding it well. It is more helpful for them to share our strategies for self-care and to encourage them to find practices that will make them feel better as well. It’s the “children model what they see, not what they hear” principle.
And if that’s the case, then we can help children overcome fear when we model hopefulness. Life is going to throw a lot of difficult challenges at us, and at our children. We can help our children, and ourselves, to develop resiliency and diminish anxiety when we acknowledge the challenges but work to move forward with hope and a positive attitude.
Building hope is a family affair. It grows from communication—shared stories, shared fears, honesty, love, and prayer.
Hope, as it is spoken of in Scripture, is not something we simply have, it’s something we do. Hope accepts reality, no matter how difficult, but keeps us moving forward. Hope nurtures perseverance.
The Prophet Jeremiah was known as the “weeping prophet” because he was called to warn the people of the Kingdom of Judah of their impending destruction, but within that message was always a message of hope, which is always part of God’s plan.
Jeremiah reminds us of the Lord’s promise: “For I know well the plans I have in mind for you—oracle of the LORD--plans for your welfare and not for woe, so as to give you a future of hope" (Jeremiah 29:11).
Mary Regina Morrell is a Catholic journalist, author, and syndicated columnist who has served the dioceses of Metuchen and Trenton, New Jersey, and RENEW International in the areas of catechesis and communication.
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Family Life
This comprehensive moral catechesis for families is available in print and online. Family Life is designed to complement the religion curriculum in your school or parish. It also integrates Child Safety Education into a holistic approach. This best-selling and most popular family program in the USA has been revised and strengthened to reinvigorate your partnership with parents. The latest revision presents the teachings of the Church with clarity and offers unparalleled support for Catholic families!
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by Mary Sellars Malloy
Question of the Week, July 26, 2020, Seventeenth Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year A
My Grandma Hovey, a nurse by profession, often said, “If you have your health, you have everything.” Would you agree? After coming through a challenging spring-into-summer, I suspect that many of our definitions of what we truly need, of what is most important, have shifted. For many of us, the forced shelter-in-place has been a call to return to what is essential: time together—playing, praying, talking, sharing meals; reconnecting with family members and friends; and finding new (and fun!) ways to celebrate graduations, birthdays, anniversaries, and life events.
For many, these have been challenging months: jobs lost, childcare unavailable, home as the classroom, and dreams for the future put on hold. We hope for a steady income and benefits, the resumption of school and parish life, and a return to face-to-face time with family members and friends.
Whatever our circumstances, today’s Gospel (Matthew 13:44-52) encourages us to keep our hearts always set on the true treasure: The Word of God revealed in Jesus Christ. In today’s Word we hear “Ask something of me and I will give it to you” (1 Kings 3:5), “We know that all things work for good for those who love God” (Romans 8:28), and “The kingdom of heaven is like a treasure buried in a field” (Matthew 13:44).
In the coming week, think about your own answer to today’s question. Choose one of the three Scripture verses and make it your prayer throughout the week. See what treasure the Lord has in store for you!
Mary Sellars Malloy has over forty years’ experience as a Catholic educator and lay minister. She is a frequent workshop presenter on the topics of prayer, liturgy, spirituality, the Sacraments, and the RCIA. In addition, Mary leads retreats and parish missions throughout the country. Her goal is to encourage Catholics of all ages to appreciate and to live their Catholic faith.Product Recommendation
Our Family Devotions
This book celebrates the many ways people of different cultures express the Catholic faith in their churches, neighborhoods, and homes. As the Good News of Jesus spread around the world, people in every culture found special ways to express their faith in God. Through the ritual words and gestures of popular devotions, Catholics show their love for God and devotion to Mary and the saints.
Some popular devotions begin with a message that is given to a person and then shared with others. Many traditions grow from the blending of the Catholic faith with a cultural celebration. Although the prayers and rituals may be adapted to meet the spiritual needs of a culture, all popular devotions are intended to help people recognize God’s love for them and grow in their love for God.
It is our prayer that through this book your family will experience God in new ways in your everyday lives. May the diverse and rich traditions of families and the Church from around the world lead you to find new ways of living out your faith. May the beauty of these devotions remind us that we are one family in Jesus Christ, sharing God’s love in our homes, churches, and communities.
by Mary Sellars Malloy
Question of the Week, July 19,2020, Sixteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year A
Today’s Gospel (Matthew 13:24-43) gives us many glimpses: a man who sowed good seed in his field, a mustard seed—the smallest of all seeds—that a person sowed in a field, and yeast that a woman took and mixed with three measures of wheat flour. Jesus offers these examples in the form of parables, stories rich with symbols that ordinary folks like me can understand.
Coming through months of uncertainty, anxiety, and fear, how would we answer the question today? What symbols would we use? I chuckle at the memory of going to the grocery and finding that the aisle with flour and yeast was totally empty—could it be that the kingdom of heaven is like a family baking together and sharing their bread with others? I recall being moved by the 7 PM ritual in New York City—the cheers, the clanging of pots, and even Broadway singers on their balconies. Could it be that the kingdom of heaven is like the encouragement that surrounded healthcare workers and first responders at the ends of their shifts? And who can forget the nationwide 3 PM playing of “Taps” this Memorial Day, in honor of fallen heroes and those who continue to serve our country? Is the kingdom of heaven like the twenty notes of that song, calling us to remember, and bringing us to tears?
The challenge of today’s Gospel is to not let the weeds of apathy, self-centeredness, and indifference overtake the signs and symbols of the kingdom of heaven we have seen in our midst. And the invitation to bake, to encourage, to remember, and to love.
Mary Sellars Malloy has over forty years’ experience as a Catholic educator and lay minister. She is a frequent workshop presenter on the topics of prayer, liturgy, spirituality, the Sacraments, and the RCIA. In addition, Mary leads retreats and parish missions throughout the country. Her goal is to encourage Catholics of all ages to appreciate and to live their Catholic faith.
Product Recommendation
Praying the Scriptures
Catechists, religion teachers, and parents will find a wealth of resources designed to help them lead others in learning and reflecting on the Sunday Scriptures in the classroom and in the home. Classroom Sessions provide catechists and religion teachers with background on the Sunday readings as well as classroom session plans for primary, intermediate, and junior high students. Questions of the Week for adults and children, in English and in Spanish, are perfect for use in parish bulletins or school newsletters, and as faith-sharing discussion starters about the Sunday readings. A liturgical year calendar is also offered for ease of reference.
by Mary Sellars Malloy
Question of the Week, July 12, 2020, Fifteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year A
One of my favorite late-May rituals is cleaning out the flowerpots on my balcony and adding fresh soil before planting herbs and flowers. This means first pulling out any remaining dead roots or stray starts of weeds and plants so that each spring I have a fresh start to my humble garden.
In today’s Gospel (Matthew 13: 1-23), we are reminded that providing good soil for the planting of the Word of God also means time first spent in preparation, removing rocks and stones, cutting away thorny branches, and adding fresh soil as needed.
In his Angelus address from July 13, 2014, Pope Francis reminds us:
[W]e are the land where the Lord tirelessly throws the seed of His Word and His love. What is our disposition when we receive it? How is our heart? What does the ground look like: a path, a stone, a thorn bush? It’s up to us to become good soil without thorns or stones, but tilled and cultivated with care, so that it can bring forth good fruit for us and for [others]. At every Mass, the good seed of the Gospel is sown in us ever anew, by means of the table of the Word of God: a seed to be accepted, to safeguard, to live.
This week, think about the garden of your heart and soul. Is it ready to receive the Word of God, or are there still preparations to be made? Talk with Jesus about any thorns or stones that are in your way.
Mary Sellars Malloy has over forty years’ experience as a Catholic educator and lay minister. She is a frequent workshop presenter on the topics of prayer, liturgy, spirituality, the Sacraments, and the RCIA. In addition, Mary leads retreats and parish missions throughout the country. Her goal is to encourage Catholics of all ages to appreciate and to live their Catholic faith.Product Recommendation
Praying the Scriptures
Catechists, religion teachers, and parents will find a wealth of resources designed to help them lead others in learning and reflecting on the Sunday Scriptures in the classroom and in the home. Classroom Sessions provide catechists and religion teachers with background on the Sunday readings as well as classroom session plans for primary, intermediate, and junior high students. Questions of the Week for adults and children, in English and in Spanish, are perfect for use in parish bulletins or school newsletters, and as faith-sharing discussion starters about the Sunday readings. A liturgical year calendar is also offered for ease of reference.
by Mary Sellars Malloy
Question of the Week, July 5, 2020, Fourteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year A
During recent shelter-in-place days, I took time to reread a favorite spiritual classic, Celebration of Discipline by Richard J. Foster. In suggesting practices for strengthening and enlivening the discipline of prayer and meditation, Foster proposes sitting quietly, resting our hands on our knees with palms upturned, and simply speaking with Jesus about anxieties, burdens, and things that are troubling our minds and hearts. “Jesus, here is what I bring to you in this moment, right now, today.”
After the burdens of mind and heart and body have been expressed, Foster invites us to place our hands palms down on our knees and to intentionally thank Jesus for taking all that we have expressed into his own hands, into his own heart. In this way, we let go and place our burdens in Jesus’ care.
I have intentionally practiced this form of prayer since mid-March, when most of us were first ordered to shelter-in-place. Into Jesus’ hands, into Jesus’ care I have released physical and emotional tiredness, concern for my husband’s safety at work and the safety of his coworkers, concern for unemployed family members and friends, even sorrow as we celebrated the first Mother’s Day and Father’s Day since the deaths of my parents.
These short and simple pauses for prayer have indeed refreshed me and strengthened me in spirit. Won’t you, too, heed Christ’s invitation in today’s Gospel to find your rest—and your refreshment—in him?
Mary Sellars Malloy has over forty years’ experience as a Catholic educator and lay minister. She is a frequent workshop presenter on the topics of prayer, liturgy, spirituality, the Sacraments, and the RCIA. In addition, Mary leads retreats and parish missions throughout the country. Her goal is to encourage Catholics of all ages to appreciate and to live their Catholic faith.Product Recommendation
Catholic Prayers and Practices
This small book, Catholic Prayers and Practices including The Order of Mass, contains traditional practices and prayers that unite us as Catholics. It is designed to support you in your faith life, and it can assist you in helping the younger members of our Church learn, grow and live as active members of the Catholic community.
This resource can be used for private, family or communal prayer. The Order of Mass section incorporates the language of the revised Roman Missal. Share the faith by giving copies of this book to others. In this way you are sharing in the ministry of our Lord, Jesus Christ, who called us to be his disciples and to share the Good News with all people.